His Safety Book

Back in September, LB started going to pre-school one morning a week. It is a Parents' Day Out program for two year olds. The idea is that it will be a good introduction to pre-school and that it will make the transition easier when he is three and ready to do school several mornings a week. I wasn't sure how LB would do. He's done great staying at our house with my parents, D's parents and his babysitter. But he is comfortable here at home and going to school is definitely a whole new ball game. I took him several times over the summer just to see the classroom and to give us an opportunity to talk about school and how he will stay with the teacher and play with other kids. I wanted to make sure I found a pre-school that wouldn't be pushy about the parents leaving right away and would work with us in making this transition. When I walked into the preschool I picked for LB, I knew I found the right place. The director was amazing and told me that they have an open door policy and she confided that her oldest daughter really struggled with separation anxiety so she understood how hard it is from first hand experience. I felt pretty confident that if LB was given the opportunity to get comfortable with me close by that he would be okay. Here he is on his official first day.

All summer we watched a show on PBS called Sid the Science Kid. At the beginning of each show, Sid is home for a bit in the morning and then his mom drives him to school. Since LB is obsessed with finding things that are the same, I kept telling him that when he went to school he would be "same as Sid." He latched on to that and I would always make a big deal about Sid getting picked up at school and then going back home. The day arrived and I prepped LB for it a ton. We talked about the schedule and how they would do circle time and craft time and play in the motor room. I took him inside the class and got him settled and then mentioned to one of the teachers that I was leaving. I told LB that we were going to be "same as Sid and that I would be back." LB gave me a kiss and waved and I left. It felt too good to be true. Well.... it was. Several of the moms decided to hang out in the nursery initially just to make sure everything was okay before leaving the building. About 20 minutes later another mom left the classroom and her kid started screaming big time. My heart rate picked up a bit because I knew that the one thing that could derail it for LB would be loud screaming from another kid. He's not a fan of other kids screaming despite his ability for loud screaming. He also feeds off other kids and once that kid started screaming I got a bad feeling about LB. A few minutes later the director came in the nursery to get me. LB had pulled himself together when I walked in the room but was sniffling and clearly upset. He saw me and as he reached his arms toward me he said with such relief, "Me get sad and Mommy come back." My heart was a puddle on the floor. 

In the end, it took a few weeks for LB to adjust. After another failed attempt at leaving, I got the idea to make a book for LB. I remembered someone posting once about providing her kid with photos of his various caretakers during the week. So I decided to take pictures of LB with his teachers and then put those pictures in a book with other people he knows and loves like D and me, his grandparents, my sister, our neighbors, close friends and his OT. I believe pretty strongly that this book ended up being the key to our success. We also worked on a few other catch phrases. "Mommy always comes back." And, "Teachers keep kids safe." LB will scroll through his picture book and say stuff like, "Greema keeps me safe." He also likes to show the pictures of his teachers to other people and tell them their names. LB checks in with me several times a day and repeats, "Mommy always comes back." And I assure him that he is right. It's very sweet and a little sad but mostly sweet. We've had two weeks in a row of successful drop offs at school. The first successful day I was overcome with how proud I was of him. It felt like a major accomplishment. And as my mom said, it's a good thing for kids to learn. They can have other trusted people in their life and learn that their parents will come back. I keep the book out in the living room so that I am reminded to show it to LB a few times a day. 

Here are a few pictures of his safety book.

It's fun to hear his interpretation of the morning and to see the art work he has created. I knew LB would get there and that it would just take some time. And let's face it, I needed time to transition too. 

It feels pretty good to be so attached to this little guy.