Don't Stop Believin'

This is my first blog post from Tulsa! I have been a bit unplugged the past 10 days or so as I've been trying to spend as much time as possible with my family. Today is our last day in town and then we head to Kansas City to see my aunt, uncle and cousins for a day and then make the long drive back to Ohio. We just barely made it into town on the 24th as a snow storm descended on Oklahoma. Soon after we arrived on the 24th my mother asked me to complete the final piece of the advent calendar. That may not seem all that significant, however, this year it had a special meaning. My mom has had this advent calendar for probably close to 15 years and each day of advent you take one of the little girls from around the world and place her in the proper day. We used to save the little American girl and the Japanese girl for the very end. You can read HERE as to why the Japanese girl held significance. Since the little girls are to represent children from around the globe there are of course a few girls from Africa. I am a little suprised that my mom never looked them all up to see all the countries but this year she was inspired. Can you see where this is going? A few days before we came to Tulsa, I got a text from my mom with the exclamation, "One of the advent girls is from Ethiopia!!" It took a moment to register but then I realized what she meant. How cool is that?! Every December for fifteen years we have brought out this calendar and counted down the days to Christmas with the little girls from around the world and all that time a little girl from Ethiopia was with us. I actually find it very comforting. Here are a few photos. Please note that I had been in the car for 12 hours so I am not looking super fresh.

Another one of "those moments" happened with one of the Christmas gifts we got for my mom. Damon and I were really trying to find several gifts this year that would be meaningful to the person receiving it but also serve as a double gift by benefitting a charity. We were looking through some of the items on the AHOPE website and found a necklace that was perfect for her. My mom is majorly into scrabble and is very good. I think Damon considers it one of his life goals to beat her just once. Well, this particular necklace had an image of Africa on a scrabble tile! We ordered it and when it came I looked at it and flipped it over and saw that it was on a "G" scrabble tile. Hello, G is for Grandma! When my mom opened it and saw the image of Africa on a scrabble tile she burst into tears. Then she flipped it over and said, "you got me G for Grandma." I explained that it just came that way and we weren't given the option to pick the specific letter for the tile. I think we all just paused and let it sink in and looked at each other. Life is pretty cool when you just let it wash over you and realize that even though it can be scary to know how much is out of your control it can also be pretty amazing. I am so grateful for that realization.

I have mentioned before that we watch a lot of "Friends" in my family and can pretty much recite dialogue from most of the episodes. As usual, we have watched a lot of Friends since I have been home but last night we watched a few episodes of my sister's and my new favorite show from 2009 - GLEE. I have always been a sucker for shows like Glee. Anything that combines high school angst with music is golden in my book. Today I went out and bought both of the soundtracks. I have decided that the chorus from one of the songs from the pilot is going to be my mantra for 2010. I am really going to need a mantra in 2010 and this song brings a smile to my face and encourages me to just keep going and to never stop believing that anything is possible. ENJOY!

Happy New Year! May your 2010 be filled with peace and happiness. AND.....

Don't Stop Believing!!

Part 2: Baby Gear

As I mentioned a few posts ago, Damon found a deal online that we could not resist. We knew that we wanted a stroller that would be a good jogger but also work for everyday outings. The ones we really coveted were super expensive and we didn't want to pay full price. About a month ago Damon started scouring Ebay and Craig's List for used strollers that were still in good condition. We weren't in any rush but we figured if a good deal came along we would take it. Last Sunday Damon was on Cleveland 's Craig's List and found a BOBs Sport Utility Stroller that appeared to be in great condition and was listed for about 60% less than a new one. Yes, I did just say a BOBs stroller!! He emailed the lady with a few questions and determined this was OUR stroller. On Friday we made the two hour drive to Cleveland and the stroller did not disappoint. Here it is!!

The stroller really is in great condition. The woman told us that it had never been soiled on, thrown up in, etc. I suppose an experienced mom would have thought to ask those questions ahead of time but I hadn't even considered that. Clearly, I am in for a rude awakening.

One feature that was important to me was that the stroller would be easy to fold and put in the trunk. Damon took the next three photos to show how simple it is.

That's it. Even I can handle it. The stroller looks heavy and bulky but it is actually really light and easy to manage. There are even cup holders and a little pouch for a cell phone. The woman who sold it to us was incredibly nice. She asked if the stroller was for our first child and I told her we were adopting from Ethiopia. Her reaction was very positive and then her 5 year old daughter piped up that she knew where Ethiopia was! Her mom pulled out a map and the little girl correctly pointed to Ethiopia. Then she showed us a book she made at school that day about Christmas traditions in other countries. She flipped to a page that said, "In Ethiopia children celebrate Christmas on January 7th." It was so sweet how excited she was to show us. She probably had about five countries in the book so it was cool that Ethiopia happened to be one of them. The woman asked us if we had an umbrella stroller and we told her no. She had one she wasn't using and gave it to us for free! So we left Cleveland with two strollers in our trunk and with warm fuzzy feelings from the kindness of strangers.

I can't resist one final photo of the stroller and my current baby.

4 months!

Today marks our 4 month anniversary on the waitlist! Right now our agency wait times are averaging around 7 months so we are getting closer. It is so satisfying to watch our name move up the list. The list is unofficial so it doesn't account for everyone but it helps to see where you are in the grand scheme of things. I check that list more than I care to admit! I have decided that it is a blessing to be in the middle of the wait during the holidays because it feels like the time is moving really fast. Everything is always so hectic and busy this time of year that the past month went by quickly. The flip side is that when you want kids and don't have them the holidays can be challenging. However, this year knowing that parenthood is approaching I think I have a healthier perspective than in years past.

Last week my good friend, Leah, asked me to do a guest post on her blog about why we chose Ethiopia. I was incredibly honored. If you read my blog then you've heard some of the stories already but HERE is the link to my guest post. She is going to have a series of several guest bloggers and I'm eager to read the others. Leah and her husband are also in the process of adopting and she has become a major part of my support system. We met through blogging and shared experiences and I really hope that we will someday be able to meet in person. What joy there will be when we both have our little ones home!

Did I mention that we have been on the waitlist for FOUR months? Heck yeah!!

Part 1: A Few Firsts

I have been dreaming for a long time about finally turning our third bedroom into the nursery for our little one. Ever since we moved into our house the third bedroom has been the junk room, ironing room (can it be an ironing room if I iron three times a year?) and the room for my elliptical machine. When we went on the waitlist we decided it was time to slowly start clearing out the room. However, Damon doesn’t really do anything slowly and when he makes up his mind to do something he pretty much goes full speed ahead. What I am saying is that I came home one day and he had pretty much emptied the room in a matter of a few hours. There went the doing it slowly over time. But it has been a tough balance to try and figure out what to do about planning the nursery. With a pregnancy the couple has a clear due date however with adoption there are so many unknowns. A lot of people recommend holding off on the nursery until after receiving the referral. I think one of the ideas behind it is that it can be sad to continuously walk by the nursery and see an empty crib when you aren't sure when that crib will be filled. Also, I think the agencies suggest having as many distractions as possible during the time in between having your referral and waiting for the court date. I obviously don’t know what that is like on a personal level. However, I know from reading other blogs and from talking to my friends here in town that the post-referral/pre-travel stage of waiting is by far the hardest. So we are trying to heed that advice and not get too wrapped up in preparing the third bedroom quite yet. We are taking the approach that if we find a good deal on something we are going to go for it. Who can turn down a good deal?

Confession: We have a crib and it is assembled. I know I am not supposed to but my mom found it on sale at Pottery Barn Kids and she got it for us. I had thought it would get delivered and we would just let the boxes hang out upstairs. I am not sure who I thought I was married to when I had that fleeting thought. Once again, I came home and the boxes were in the garage ready to be recycled and the crib was totally assembled. He just cannot help himself. Other than that, I promise the nursery still has a long ways to go.

We have received a few firsts that I want to document for the little Buster.

First Stuffed Animal: My friend, Nancy, gave this to us. She literally brought it over to us the day after we told her we were adopting!

First Books: I think you can guess a certain librarian (aka Mom) that sent us these. I am glad that I have already started a collection of books, especially books that have African themes and characters.

First Handmade Blanket: Nancy's mother made us this. I was so touched. It is very soft and I love all the colors.

First Nursery Decoration: This is from Land of Nod but is designed by Zid Zid kids. I fell in love with it a while ago and was nervous it would get discontinued so I went ahead and ordered it. I love most of the stuff at Land of Nod and the bonus is that they have a lot of eco-friendly products. You can also get the stuffed animals that are in the quilt directly from Zid Zid kids. Too cute. I will have to keep myself from going overboard.

Obviously, at the core of all of this is we are excited. It is hard to hold off on getting this stuff ready because we are so ready for him/her to be here!!

To be continued. Part 2: We are taking a little road trip to Cleveland on Friday because Damon is super gifted at finding good deals online.

Looking WAY Back

I have noticed that almost every year when I am home for Christmas I end up in my dad’s study looking through the photo albums from when my sister and I were little kids. I am really grateful that my parents took so many pictures because a lot of my childhood memories stem from looking at those photos. Now that everything is digital I find that Damon and I have most of our photos online and the majority of them are not printed and organized into albums. I am making a promise right now, on the internet for all to read, that when the little Buster is here I will print out photos and organize them into albums. Okay, I am glad that is out there so that I will be held accountable! Last year at Christmas Damon and I were still several months away from making the final decision to adopt but it was definitely on our hearts and minds. I remember pausing at a few photos from when I was four to five years old and thinking about their significance. Like most kids, I latched on to a few things and was fairly obsessed. I know that I went through a stage when I had to wear dresses. I actually have a memory of being on Columbia’s campus with my dad and he was pointing out all the “cool college girls” who were wearing pants. I wanted nothing of it, which is odd to me because now I would rather be in jeans and a t-shirt over a dress any day. I would say that the dress obsession overlapped another very important obsession. I LOVED the movie Annie. I am not even sure the word obsessed does it justice. I knew every single song and owned all sorts of Annie gear. I remember my Grandma Virginia took me to see an outdoor production of Annie and I loved every minute of it. I get that most girls my age at the time were also obsessed with Annie. I get it. But it just pleases me that at the age of four and five I had such a huge heart for orphan Annie. Some people would call that a coincidence but I believe it was just the beginning. It was the beginning of this adoption path.

I thought I would endure the embarrassment to share a few photos of the obsession with you.

I think I was Annie for two Halloweens in a row. My mom recently apologized for turning me into Annie with the measles instead of Annie with freckles.

Please note the Annie nightgown. How cute is my little sister?!

Maggie and I in our matching Annie dresses. I would like my mom to explain the state of my bangs in this photo. Wow.

Happy Birthday, Grandma Edie!

Happy Birthday, Grandma Edie! My dad left for Florida on Saturday to go celebrate my Grandma's birthday and I WISH I could be there too. I was lucky enough to go last year and it was quite the party. I never knew my biological grandfather on my dad's side and always considered my dad's step-dad to be my grandpa. Actually, he was my "Pa John" and he was the kindest man. He had three kids so if you add that to my grandma's three sons then it was quite the clan. Last year people kept referring to the six kids as the Brady Bunch. My grandma is a role model to so many of us. She is incredibly generous and often insists that for her birthday and Christmas not to give her any gifts but to donate to charity instead. I remember one Christmas, instead of giving us gifts she sent my parents money with the instructions to buy something for a family in need. Like I said, she is a great role model. My grandmother is also incredibly hip. She has a cell phone and is very internet savvy. She even reads this blog and I know she will disapprove of all the attention. Too bad! I can't wait until we can refer to her as Great-Grandma Edie to the little Buster!

Grandma Edie, I hope you have a wonderful birthday! Love you!

(This is one of my favorite photos of my dad and my grandma. It was taken a while ago but I thought they would both appreciate their youthful looks.)

Happy December

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving! Mine was quite relaxing. Ever since we have been married Damon and I have spent Thanksgiving in Ohio with the Busters and Christmas in Oklahoma with my parents. My parents have spent two Thanksgivings at the Buster's house and even though the last time they came was many years ago my dad still talks about the food, especially the oyster stuffing. Damon’s dad always puts together quite the spread. My favorite is my mother in law’s pumpkin pie though. I made sure to have an after breakfast snack of pumpkin pie on Friday just so I could get in one more piece before we left. Since his parents graciously prepared all the food, I was able to read an entire book on Thursday morning. It was a short book but I thought it was pretty lucky that while lots of folks were at work in the kitchen I got to read a book. Hopefully, next year I will be busy chasing around the little Buster. I read the book, Push, which was the inspiration for the new movie 'Precious.' If you have seen the previews for the movie then you know that the book was not an easy read in terms of content. There was inspiration to be found through all the hardships and my favorite part of the book was the process she went through to learn how to read and write. So many of us had parents that read to us when we were young and we started to learn our ABCs in preschool and by middle school reading and writing was just a given. Words are such a powerful tool and for the main character it was the start of gaining her self worth. The book didn’t exactly make for the kind of morning you would get from watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade but it was an amazing story and I’m glad I read it.

Now that Thanksgiving is behind us I am starting to get in the holiday spirit. Although some of my neighbors seem to be going totally overboard. I am all for some sparkly lights and candles in the windows but some of the newer Christmas decorations are just over the top and completely miss the point of Christmas in my opinion. Do you live in a neighborhood where people have those huge blow-up snow globes or Santas or whatever? There is a house that literally has 5 of them, plus candy canes, plus reindeer, plus lights. The house looks like it threw up Christmas. It is just too much. And the blow-up things make this humming noise that totally freaks out my dog. It is just wrong all around. I will now stop complaining and get back to the holiday spirit.

One of my favorite December traditions is the get together we do with our close group of friends here in Columbus. Our first year here we exchanged small gifts with Marty, Kara and Nancy. Then the next year we decided that was silly and I’m not sure whose idea it was (I would like to credit but I don’t believe that would be accurate) but we came up with the plan to buy toys for Toys for Tots instead. It was so much more fun to go to the store and pick out games, basketballs and Barbies for kids instead of stressing out over what to get and how much to spend on each other. We then added a lunch component so now we meet for lunch and then all caravan over to the local TV station and drop off the toys. Over the years Corey joined in and then Don and then Chris and Suzie and now we have little ones in the group too so it just keeps expanding. I look forward to it every year and this will be our 8th year! I highly recommend it!

More referrals keep rolling in for Gladney families and it is super exciting! I am eager for lots more December referrals! There are also several families with December court dates and I REALLY hope they are successful and we get to see more families united.

Last but not least, today is World AIDS Day. My friend, Paige, wrote an amazing post on her blog. You should really go read it. You should also go read Heidi’s post. They both said it way better than I ever could. Peace.